Transmission – BBC Top Gear Australia

Big news straight out of Dublin: the Stig has been SENSATIONALLY ARRESTED by a FRIENDLY POLICEMAN following an ALLEGED INCIDENT of some kind.

Eyewitnesses reported seeing the white-suited racing driver being hauled from his car by a member of the local Garda late yesterday afternoon, not 10 minutes after he mysteriously disembarking a bus headed to the city centre. “I didn’t see what happened exactly,” said one onlooker, “but it was probably really bad. Maybe he punched a swan or tried to push one of the Hairy Bikers into the river. Again.”

The local police are yet to comment on the ALLEGED INCIDENT, but did helpfully confirm that the Natural Museum’s gift shop stays open until 5pm on weekdays. This isn’t the first time that Top Gear’s tame racing driver has been in trouble with the authorities. In 2006 he had a similar run-in while racing Clarkson to Scotland in a kit car. By freakish coincidence, the 2009 Top Gear Live World Tour will be stopping off in Dublin in December, before kicking on to Sydney in  February. And if you haven’t got tickets yet, grab ‘em here.

And thanks to Stig’s little brush with the law, the world now knows all about that. Which is lucky. Police have asked anyone with further information to refrain from writing ‘Wooh, first comment!’ in those box-things below.